I’m not sure how to begin or what to exactly say other than the things I need to say. There are friends whom we have in our life that we love and adore. Whom contact us and try to be there while there are some who choose not to for some reason. Well, This is my open letter to my ex best friend. The one I thought we were I felt we would be close forever yet I was left confused and alone.
I’ve said this many times and I’ll keep saying it starting the last time we made those empty promises while drunk hugging on each other saying I miss you and we need to catch up four years ago. There’s so much to say, but not a lot to say at the same time because of all the time that has passed between us. I’m not bitter because I think of our friendship is like a distant memory. I remember our last conversation as you just got back together with him for the “last time” and I was still with my dearest. We cried over the miss time and bringing up memories as we both laughed while we tried to catch up over alcoholic beverages.
Its been almost a year since those words of “I miss you” and “we need to catch up” came out of your mouth as I awkwardly sipped on my first beer of the night while you were obviously smashed when you spotted me. Last I heard you were engaged but that was months ago yet when I asked you to come to my house-warming.. You didn’t show. In fact you haven’t responded to me in months if not longer.
I tried getting us together but I didn’t know when we grew apart and when you started to dislike me. I didn’t know if it was me or if it was just us growing apart as we got older. It was not easy accepting the friend I used to see all the time is now no where in my life. The one were we would go shopping together or gush over the gossip at work. How you met me on campus when I transferred where I got us lunch while we giggled about the cute guys at my school. We talked for hours when the sun would be up before we would go to sleep and the nights spent together discussing our future plans. You had my back and I had yours. Everyone still refers to you as my sister and each time I get upset because I miss the memories and someone I used to know.
Now we are merely acquaintances or less with our own lives going on. For a moment last year I thought we were growing close again but I was fooled by person in need of comfort. You were going to be my future maid of honor and god mother of my first-born, whom I am carrying now, yet now you will be that faint memory of crazy nights and funny stories for when I get older.
Quite sure there will be many more “I miss you” and “we need to catch up” over the years until one of us moves away.
I just hope you have found that happiness you been chasing.